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| 24th September 1999 | Weather : Quite nice for the time of year | |
STORM WARNING PROVES BOGUSLocal residents were both confused and panic stricken at the time. Mr. David Dodd who runs the local video store in the village summed up the sentiments of many :
" I couldn't sleep and was watching a late night film. I went to make a cup of tea and whilst in the kitchen turned on the radio, as I'm a big fan of Donny Donaldson. He's so funny and plays some good stuff, the New Radicals Morcheeba etc, when suddenly he was warning everbody about a potential storm. Well I was up early the following day to buy some chipboard and nails to secure the house and shop. There was a huge queue outside the iromongers and the prices seemed to have increased significantly. I don't blame the owner as he explained that this was normal at this time of year apparently." Mr. Horsley of 'Horsley's Hi-Fi" was another who had heard the warning ;
"I was repairing some old amps in the sitting room and my girl-friend, who couldn't sleep, was catching up with the ironing in the kitchen. We are both big fans of the show and were stunned to hear such disturbing news. Needless to say we rushed out the following day to prepare for the worst, which meant spending a great deal of money. Neil at the ironmongers was his usual helpful self and explained that the slightly higher prices were due to a significant rise in the past few weeks of precious metal prices on the international exchanges. Personally I don't follow these things but he is such a knowledgable chap that I'm sure he's correct." One voice of dissent came from Mr. Lucas who runs the Newsagents-cum-Off Licence :
"It's pants if you ask me. The word goes around that there's a so called storm so I go out and board up my shop as I'm worried about the problem of looting and then nothing happens. Then Donaldson appears in the shop and clears me out of champagne. Seems a bit strange if you ask me." One happy person however was Mr. Aslett at the local garage. He informed the Gazette that he hadn't heard the weather forecast and so had taken no action. He had however just sold a brand new Porche 911.
"I can't reveal the name of the buyer as I'm sworn to secrecy, but he didn't even bother haggling over the price. He's obviously worth a few bob."
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SCUFFLE AT THE ROSE AND CROWN | ||
| There was a minor disturbance at the Rose and Crown last Wednesday night, when two men were evicted from the pub by landlord Mr. Paul Mullin. The police were later called but there were no arrests and the case is now considered closed. Details are sketchy, but apparently an argument broke out between two customers over the price being charged for some video tapes contained in a brown paper bag. Said Mr. Mullin " It really was a storm in a teacup, there was obviously a difference of opinion between these two gentlemen and when it looked as though it was getting heated, I kindly asked them to leave. I do not expect such behaviour from my regulars. As the village knows I endeavor to run a friendly hostelry suitable for the whole family and my major concern at the time was that the bad language being used, may upset other customers."The name of the two men in question is not known, but it is believed that one had a distinctive Midlands accent and the other originated from Harrow in North London although as Mr. Mullin somewhat amusingly added : "we're not talking of the famous English public school, here !"
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POLICE RAID LOCAL BEAUTICIAN | ||
| Police today described the checking of services offered at "Ange's Beautician" as "merely undertaking routine enquiries."
"We were concerned by the fact that the shop seemed to be open at some fairly strange times" commented PC Tinker. "I have been undertaking lengthy interviews with the girls who work here to ensure that all seems to be in order and I am pleased to say that this is definitely the case" he added.The presence on the premises of a local Fillipino girl, who does not officially work at the shop, was of no great concern he said, as she was simply a good friend of the proprietor and on the night in question her boyfriend was preoccupied reading 'Hi-Fi Weekly' and being bored had gone there to seek more interesting company. In answer to a question related to his own appearance PC Tinker, looking a little flushed and smelling distinctly of 'Baby powder', explained that due to the fact that he had a Police Ball to attend that evening with his wife and as a consequence of the time consuming interviews, he himself was running a little late and had merely availed himself of the bathing facility offered on the premises.
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A CASE OF FOOD POISONING AT THE ROSE AND CROWN ? | ||
| It seems that many in the village are blaming the cooking at the 'Rose and Crown' for the current severe bout of stomach upsets and chronic diarrhoea that seems to be affecting so many of the local community. Mr. Mullin was very non-commital on the issue, merely explaining that having lived in Asia for a period of their lives, he and his wife were very partial to both Japanese and Chinese cuisine.
" Maureen decided to experiment a little at lunchtime and tried to offer the regulars a more varied diet than that of shepherds pie and chips. In retospect it was probably a mistake, the sushi offered as a bar snack was probably a little too ambitious and it certainly is not meant to be eaten in a sandwich accompanied by 3 pints of 'Speckled Hen' as some of the lunch-time regulars were doing."
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